Oh yeah...

I moved!  I changed my website format and now it has a blog type thing on it.  So just pop over to www.marionkoleski.com!  I'm not very good about blogging stuff, but I do try!

Just for you...

Just for you, I thought I'd try a product review.   Okay, really I was curious and I'm using you to justify my spending money on satisfying my curiosity!

I got eyelash extensions this afternoon.  This is a growing trend for brides, on the same list as mani/pedi and hair.  A friend had hers done in California and raved about it so I thought I would give it a shot.

The process was uncomfortable, smelly, and generally unpleasant, though the technician was lovely and charming.  However, I look ridiculous.  So ridiculous that even though I took a photo, you will not be seeing it!  My husband has been looking at me strangely all evening.  Plus, my vision is impaired.  And, to top it off, they only last 1-2 weeks at best.

I'm debating between trying to take them off (and risking losing my natural lashes) and going and paying to have them removed.  Safer, but a little annoying to throw good money after bad.

SO.... don't say I didn't warn ya.  Go with 5 layers of mascara instead.

On a personal note, we got a kitten.  I am in luvvvvv with her.

Congrats, congrats, congrats, congrats!

I'm way behind on blogging!  I apologize!  Such a diverse group in the last little while, too.

Congratulations to....

...John and Lisa Moder!  An intimate family affair at home, the bride wore purple.  They have the cutest baby daughter, who graciously slept through *most* of the ceremony.

...Antonio and Janet Torres!  A non-traditional wedding site near Sault Ste Marie.  This bride wore black and it looked fabulous.

...Aaron and Rebekah Williams!  A small but traditional ceremony, they were married at Celery Flats in the historic home.  Aaron and Rebekah expect their second child soon!

And, the one I actually have a photo of (thanks to the bride's sister since I can't remember a camera to save my life):

...Adam and Ashley Ferris!  A traditional wedding at Deer Run Golf Course in Lowell, MI.  I married Ashley's sister a few years ago and it was wonderful to see everyone again.  Check out that dress!  If I ever had a renewal, I would so want that dress.

Is it really an "elopement"?

I get a lot of calls for "elopements".  Any bride who has a limited amount of time to plan her event seems to think that she is eloping!   I've had many brides with formal gowns, formal flowers, professional hair and a professional photographer insist that they are, indeed, eloping!  I adhere to the old-school definition of elopement, which includes only a couple of family members or friends, and a brief, informal ceremony.

Please understand that when you book me for an elopement, that it is a very limited service.  Elopement does not include telephone/email support, a customized ceremony, travel outside of Portage, etc.

I absolutely understand how the intention of eloping progresses into a wedding - it happens more than you would imagine!  Please know that while an elopement occupies a few hours of work for me, your more traditional wedding will occupy most of at least one day, and often most of about three days between preparation, travel, etc.  Fees are set accordingly.  If your elopement turns into a wedding, traditional wedding fees will apply.

Not a wedding topic....

Hey, have you ever thought about being an organ donor?  Get the sticker for your license, but talk to your loved ones about your decision, as they are able to override that sticker!!  I can't think of anything better you could ever do for another person than to get them another chance at life.

Also, living donations are possible for Kidney, Liver, and Marrow.  Just sayin'.  Think about it.

Availability update

So, as of right now I'm booked (or gone for every weekend in May and every weekend in June.

All other months have some availability. 

If you want to book, better get crackin'!

Marriage has a 50/50 chance of failure.

People say it all the time... "well, you know, marriage is a 50/50 bet!"  And then people quibble about the exact statistics, their basis, etc.

I agree with 50/50.  Yup.  It sure is.  It's either YES or NO.  50/50.  Choose YES, every day.  Choose to be a person that your loved one will say YES to, every day. 

That's all! 

Winter... is it over yet?

Things are picking up with calls/emails for 2010's wedding season, but winter seems like it's taking forever to wrap up!  On the upside, I ran into the lovely Rev. Colleen Burns the other day at my daughter's sporting event.   

I really don't have anything interesting to say, it's just been a while since I popped on here! 

Winter weddings

This month, Kerri and Marcus were wed in my three season room... a quick affair with chic black dresses and several friends.  Caitin and Shane are being married there tomorrow!  I've recently installed a fireplace and carpet, and the next step will be more lighting. It's fine in the daytime but can be a strain to read vows for an evening wedding. 

I have to tell you about Ron and Nancy's wedding, though.  New Year's Eve, I arrive at their friends' home where there is a party with several couples.  Ron brings me downstairs and introduces me as a special guest, and says "And you're all invited to our wedding in about ten minutes upstairs!"  It was awesome!  Everyone kind of paused and then the room erupted in giggles and congratulations and "are you serious?"

Everyone bundled up and we headed out to the deck, which had Christmas lights strung around the railing.  Huge flakes of snow started falling as we completed the ceremony.  Soooooo much fun, such great friends and such a lovely couple.  It was really a fun time and I loved the "surprise" element!!! 

Happy New Year's, y'all...  be safe, happy, healthy, and loved!

Congratulations Sarah and Ben!

Sarah and Ben had their wedding at the Antwerp Activity Center in Mattawan.  This is a great site... roomy, new, easy access.  The only disadvantage is that the walls are painted cinderblock, so you have to put some expense/effort into masking them.  Sarah went with an arbor and a red/white tulle backdrop, which added some drama!  Also dramatic - her gown had a lot of red embroidery on it, which really popped!  Loved the aisle treatment.... gobs of petals down each side, then at the end of each row a tall vase with water and a floating candle inside.  (Although clutzy me managed to break one after the ceremony.  Sorry again!)

Just a gorgeous bride and a charming groom and a great day overall.  Congratulations you guys!!  Welcome to happily ever after!

Congratulations to the Metzgers!

Laura and Chris had their wedding at Stetson Chapel, which is on the campus of Kalamazoo College.   I love this venue, except for a couple of oddities.  It has 2 aisles, not a central aisle.  And even though it's huge and it has an audio system, rental does not include use of their audio!!  My puny system does not fill this space.  However, we had a great time.  I loved their readers.  It's always interesting watching people do readings.  Oddly, many couples pass on having readers, but I highly encourage it.  It's so compelling, the emotions that readers go through, as they simultaneously wish you the best and remember their own highs and lows. 

Everything went great, except as I was trying to create a sentimental moment, the bride (in an effort to keep the groom from crying) stuck out her tongue and crossed her eyes!  I almost died laughing.  :) 

Photography was done by the talented Melissa Gregerson.  Still looking?  Google her.  She's awesome.

Congratulations to the Johnsons!

I love Al and Cyndi.  Let me just put that out there.  They are so fun, and so into each other.  It's just always a blast to be with them, and their families are great too!  They had their wedding and reception at Schnauzer's hall in Schoolcraft.  Among their bridal party were their teen/young adult children.  We just had a super time and I'm so happy for them!

Oh, and I love a tiara!  Every bride should feel like a princess.... though I can tell that it's not the tiara that makes her feel that way... it's him.  :) 

Congratulations to the Walkers and the Dragoos!!

Kristin and David had their wedding at Robin's Nest, which is a reception hall near exit 104 on I-94.  It's a very nice site, and pretty quiet!  (Reading back over my entries, I have issues with ambient noise.)  Just a lovely family affair!

Jenny and Steve's wedding was at South Haven's south beach.  It's always fun doing a wedding in such a public area.  There are cheers and wishes of good luck from many strangers as you work your way down to the site, and applause for the kiss!  Such a great couple!

Best of luck to them all!!

What a gorgeous day to get married!

This morning I was concerned because it was cool out, but it warmed up just in time. 

Erika and Tom are an absolutely hilarious couple (you can tell), and we had a great time.  The wedding was at Grand Haven Golf Club at their pavilion.  I'd recommend that space for 70 or less, though you can fit more if you don't mind a little awkward seating.  Their recessional song was the Black Eyed Peas' "Tonight", which has been in my head ever since!!  "I gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night..."

Side note, it was only 15 minutes from the Dutch Village in Holland, so I took my kids there beforehand and we had a blast!  Klompen!!

Congratulations!

New policy in 2010.

One wedding per weekend.  This will allow me to give you my undivided attention.  I've felt rather rushed lately and had to refer out a couple of weddings in order to be positive that everyone could be covered without issue. Plus I feel like I'm living in my car!!! 

:) 

Why the "blah blah blah"?

In rehearsals, I do not read the text of your ceremony.  I'll give you the beginning and end of certain parts, so you know what cues a transition, but the rest of it I say "blah blah blah".  Why?

Because you should only say your vows once.  The one time that they are so loaded, so intense, that they will be seared into you for life.  They are not lines of a play, to be memorized and acted out.  They should not become rote.  They should be potent, powerful.

Just sayin'.  ;)

Congratulations to....

...  Danny and Rachel!  They had their very intimate, casual wedding at a tiny park outside Conklin.  So basically, the middle of nowhere.  Being so far out, it was super quiet and just beautiful.  She in purple high tops, he with a purple striped shirt... so cute!  And a gorgeous old getaway car with fins. 

...  Kristin and Doug!   Their wedding was very traditional, held at the amazing chapel at Starr Commonwealth.  Such a wonderful building!  They also had a live organist, and you know how I LOVE live music.  There's really no substitute.  Everything went smooth as pie!

I think both couples are in for a long and happy future.  Good luck to you all!

Busy busy busy!!!!

Last weekend Jessie and Eric got married at the Fetzer Center, which is at WMU.  I seem to do a lot of weddings there, and I believe it is for a few reasons.  It's very accessible, being part of WMU and close to the highway.  It's affordable (or so I hear).  And it's just a lovely backdrop.  All but one of the weddings I have done there were held on the deck, which has a full woody background.  Also, there's not a ton of outdoor noise! They are a lovely, happy couple!! 

Today Adrienne and Kevin were married at Bay Pointe Inn, where I also seem to get a lot of weddings lately!  I love it there.  It's not for a 300+ person wedding, in my opinion, but for the average sized wedding it is great.  Mariesa, the special events coordinator is awesome.  Adrienne and Kevin had a sentimental wedding, with a couple of giggles thrown in.  Such a great group of friends. :)

Tomorrow, 2 more weddings!  And 3 more next weekend.  *whew*  And of course..... I left my new camera at work.   Geez Louise.

Guess what I bought?

A NEW CAMERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No more excuses.  Photos every time, I swear.  I was thinking about doing pics of the venues too, in case it might be helpful.  We'll see.  But this is much better than trying to snag my daughter's camera to do it!  I'm excited!  It's a fairly inexpensive one, just a Kodak easyshare, but it's snazzy.  And red. 

TJ and Grace

Todd and Gracstina's wedding was held at the amazing Oliver Mansion Gardens, in South Bend.  It's part of a small museum complex in the historical district which includes a Studebaker museum! 

They had a lovely harpist, and chose a brief ceremony.  The couple's daughter toddled down the aisle with the assistance of one grandma, and was just tooooooooo cute for words.  The bridesmaids wore variations on soft pink, green, and yellow.

It's been a very sad week for them personally, with the loss of a parent, so we kept the service short, sweet, and not too emotional.  We got through the ceremony - even with the baby, the emotional overload, and a passing fire truck playing a part.

TJ, Grace, and Alyssa are a lovely little family and I wish them the best!

Bookings for 2009 are now closed.

I am still booking for 2010 and 2011.  Here's the fun part.  My fees, if they increase, do it on the first of the year.  If you book  (meaning send in your contract and deposit)  by Dec 31, you will lock in your rate at the 2009 price.  Wow, what a deal!! 

Things that surprise people about me.

Due to the nature of this business, I meet new people all the time, and those people have expectations of me that I may or may not meet. So I thought I'd share the most common ones...

1. I'm young-looking. I'm actually decently past 30 and have a teenage kid. But apparently I don't look that old because people always act shocked.

2. I'm extremely goofy (see pic). I'm laughing all the time, and I am kind of a wise-ass. I will throw the deuces at a photographer at the slightest provocation.

3. I cuss sometimes. (See #2.) It's a bad habit, and I AM working on it, but I've been working on it for about 30 years or so now. I blame the military.

I'll think of more, I'm sure... and I'll share!

Pic courtesy of the fantastic http://www.amystraka.com/ (No worries, this was BEFORE the ceremony!!!)

Your signature

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but... ladies? Grab a pen.

When you sign your marriage license, you must sign your MARRIED NAME. So sorry, no, you don't get a few weeks to decide whether you're going to change your name or not. Make up your mind now! And then, get to scribbling. Because it is hard to write a new name, and you don't want to mess it up on your documents.

Go on!! Start now!

IMPORTANT: New Policy on Rescheduled Dates

Rescheduled dates have not happened to me very often, and as a result I didn't really have a clear cut way of dealing with that. However, the need for a clear way of dealing with it has been made clear. So...

From this point forward (Aug 09), IF YOU HAVE A CHANGE IN YOUR REHEARSAL/WEDDING DATE, I will require you to submit a revised contract. The reason for this is that the contract is ultimately the document I go to for information. I can't pull up our entire email conversation history every time there is a question, as I am on the road a lot. I depend on paper, particularly the one with your signature on it. So having an accurate contract is vital. There will be no extra charge or anything, just print it off the site and write REVISED DATE across the front.

Really cool seating chart tool.

Just drag and drop!

www.weddingmapper.com/guests/demo_seating

Congratulations to the Galindos, the Clabaughs, and the Richters!

What a busy weekend!

The Pam and Ron Richter wedding was Friday at South Haven Inn and Suites. The weather was very tricky this weekend. We got sprinkled on at this outdoor wedding, but it held off until after the ceremony to really rain. Bride and groom - gorgeous and so perfect together, and his children stood up with the as well. The venue has a lovely pond with waterfall, but there is quite a bit of highway noise. Oh, and their DJ was great -- very helpful! http://www.stilltheonedj.com/. :)

Then Saturday we had Jill and Jose Galindo, who had to do a bit of rearranging due to the weather. It poured all morning, but was nice and hazy - though humid. We did the wedding on a bluff overlooking Lake Michigan at Potawottamie Resort. (I'm sure I'm spelling that wrong.) A very casual, intimate ceremony that included their children. I didn't have much of a chance to explore the venue, which is a kind of a cabins resort deal, but I'd like to go back for a weekend there sometime... the real estate is just unbelievable.

Saturday wrapped up with Victoria and Nick Clabaugh (pic courtesy of Amy Straka). They had their traditional wedding (munchkin included) at Center Meeting House at Morris Farms in Niles. This is a beautiful old traditional chapel that just made it into my top 5 venues. It's very simple, and symmetrical, and spare, and I just love it to pieces. The only real issue is that since it is all hard surfaces, it's very echoey. Anyway, everyone looked lovely, and I'm happy to see lace making a comeback on dresses! Beautiful.

So, everyone should be partying the night away about now, so I'm going to go cuddle up with my own hubby and call it a night. Congrats to all!!!

Congratulations to the Carters and the Giordanos!

The Carters popped in this morning to get married, a quick casual elopement. They brought their sweet new baby daughter, who can't even hold her head up too well just yet. Such an angel!

The Giordanos had their semi-formal wedding at the clubhouse for their apartment community. It was intimate, fun, and very happy! They each have a daughter and they are about the same age, and they stood up with their parents along with their adult bridal party. Such a lovely couple - she was very "old hollywood" with the fabulous hair and red, red lips, and he was looking pretty spiffy in a pinstriped suit.

Pics to follow, once I find my cord. Pics are always my downfall, it seems.

Congratulations to both couples!

Chad and Carrie

I remembered a camera!! It's a red-letter day!

What fun! This was my first time at Yarrow, which is a golf course north of Augusta. It's waaaaaay out in the middle of nowhere, and as a result is very quiet and peaceful. For those still looking for a venue I would say biggest advantage (from my perspective) is the amazing staff. They are really top notch, and reflective of the upscale enviroment they are creating. The biggest disadvantage is that there is a lot of walking from the parking lot to the entrance of the lodge, with no shuttle that I was aware of. (Although you can pull up to the door to drop off mobility impaired guests.) Always look at a venue with mobility impaired guests in mind!

Chad and Carrie are a very cool, laid back couple, and they had a wonderful large wedding party with five on each side. The bride's brother wore his Navy uniform to walk her down the aisle. It was too windy to manage unity candles, but everything else went very smoothly - even the pitbull ringbearers! Not quite as we rehearsed, but everything worked out okay with a modicum of fussing or barking. The readings were great... the speakers did quite well even though the first was nervous, and the second were almost overcome with emotion!

Congratulations to Chad and Carrie!!!

You want unique? You want memorable?

Because that's what all my couples say, it seems.

But then you show them something like this and they go "nah, that's a bit too much."

A friend shared this with me and I laughed till I cried, I think it's so awesome.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0

Let's talk about.... Arches and the like.

At just about any craft store or business that carries wedding-related items, you can pick up a small, easy to assemble, lightweight, often prelit arch.

Don't.

I'm serious! I know, I was just baggin' on the runners, and now I'm killing the arbor. But it is what it is. Those arches are fine for indoor weddings, but cannot handle even the slightest of breezes, the slightest irregularities in terrain, etc.

Still want to be married under an arbor? Buy a proper one. They run between 100-150 at any garden store. Nice, solid ones. Can't afford to buy one or just don't think you'll find a use for it later? Borrow mine. I'm serious, just ask. It pops apart easily because I didn't use the screws, and I keep it on my three season porch so it isn't weathered at all.

A similar nod to rented pillars to define the ceremony space. Great in theory. Great indoors. Bad in wind, bad on uneven terrain. I was actually conked on the head a couple of years ago by a six foot tall rented pillar toppling in a mild breeze. I was not thrilled. (Fortunately it was the rehearsal, not the wedding.) The pillars, and many arches over these years, have been weighted down with ugly rocks, 2x4 wooden contraptions and the like. Is this really what you want in your wedding photos? Just some food for thought.

Let's talk about.... Aisle Runners

Runners don't work. I know they look good in the pictures you see, but unless you're going to sew and weight down a good fabric one that's sized to fit your space, don't bother. The papery ones they sell at craft stores in the wedding aisle... here's what happens.

First they stick when you unroll them. And the free end flies away unless you weight it down. And nothing says romance like a big pile of rocks by your feet!

Then you're left with the big roll when you step on. Because it's not like you have the guys back there with scissors.

So you step. And the runner, which is probably on grass, sinks into it. And your nice flat wide runner becomes a bunched piece of trash, essentially. (On a normal hard floor it still wrinkles and moves some, just not as bad as it does on grass or earth.)

Sometimes, depending on your dress, the friction makes a weird noise.

PLEASE. Don't do it. Consider alternatives. Perhaps you could line each side of your path with luminaries, rose petals, or kissing balls. ANYTHING BUT THAT PAPER RUNNER!!!!

Rex and Sariah

This one was almost like my own family. I've known Sariah since 7th grade, if not earlier, and Rex was a couple years ahead of us in school.

They had a lovely intimate wedding at mom's waterfront home, in the gazebo on their island. The groom's best friend stood up for him, while the bride's 2 children did the honors on her side. A friend sang "God bless the broken road" for the processional song, which totally describes the path they've traveled so far.

It was really wonderful to see everyone - 13 year old kids whose diapers I've changed! I feel so old.

Best wishes to Rex and Sariah!! Treat her good man, I know where you live!!

Let's talk about.... Cancelled weddings

I got my first ever cancellation today, so let me just recap what happens.

1. I know if your fiance just called it off you probably don't want to deal with calling all the vendors. However, I need to speak with you, not a mom or anyone. This is because my contract is with you. Imagine, if you will, an estranged family member or friend calling and telling me your wedding was off, but it not being true. It would be a cruel joke if you were standing at the altar and I didn't show up! So, I know it's painful, but I do have to verify it with either the bride or groom.

2. No, deposits are not refundable. It's clearly stated in the contract. The reason is because that your date(s) were blocked out for you. Most often I've turned down 2 or 3 other weddings for that date because it was reserved for you. The deposit is really a "lost opportunity" fee, in the event of cancellation by you. (If a cancellation is by me, of course I return your deposit, as specified in the contract.)

Big hugs going out to my cancellee today... hopefully we'll have a new contract soon. :)

Matt and Holly

Matt and Holly were looking for a very intimate ceremony - just them and their parents, so I suggested Lakeview Park. Although it was quite warm today, the shaded dock kept things just about perfect. (If you're looking for it, it's to the left of the turnaround.)

Don't get me wrong, I love a big wedding. But I absolutely adore a small ceremony... just the people who love you more than all others, and each other. I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but after having traditional first weddings, my husband and I married at a beachfront park in Hawaii. No guests, no parents, no kids... and it is just a different experience, and can be quite intense.

Four proud parents, two teary lovers, and one baby waiting a while longer to make his/her entrance. Such a great wedding!!

Best of luck to Matt and Holly!

Mike and Onda

Mike and Onda's wedding was at Michaywe in Gaylord. That's a bit of a drive (4 hrs), but I've gone further before.

Onda and I had known each other for several years, actually, so I was delighted when she asked me to officiate. I hadn't met Mike before but he's just perfect for her.

The bridesmaids wore yellow, and rather than a traditional dark tux, the mens' suits were kind of a khaki color. It looked great, and very appropriate for the pond-front daytime wedding.

Some breezes took out our unity candles, and the audio there is a little strange, but all in all things went well.

Congratulations Mike and Onda!

You know what?

I really love that I'm blogging these now. Reading back through them brings back a lot of great memories, and a lot of lessons learned. I wish I'd started doing this at the very beginning!

Curt and Cary

Curt and Cary had their wedding at Historic Bowen's Mill in Middleville. It's just a little north of Gun Lake. It is charming! There's all sorts of farm animals, several historic buildings, and a mill - of course - on a creek.

Curt and Cary decided to align their seats so the covered bridge would be the backdrop. While that was pretty, I'd root for choosing a north-south alignment a little further up the hill where the land is flat and the shade consistent. Doing it their way, it was a steep descent for guests and bridal party alike. Additionally, the creek and the paddle thing on the mill make for a bit of noise for myself and the musician to struggle with. That said, it was really pretty! Even with a couple of guests in wheelchairs or using walkers, everyone did manage the hill, and the long trek back to the reception hall.

They chose something really cute - all seven bridesmaids had dresses that were different colors, but the same style. The colors made me think of sherbert! And their escorts had vests and ties to match. They strung chinese lanterns of the same colors over the seating area, which made it look much more festive than if it were just the lines of white chairs. The bouquets were multi-colored, and featured amazing peonies that I just loooove.

The site was really great after the ceremony - those with kids wandered over to visit the llama, those who smoke went over to the outdoor covered deck, and those who were too warm headed in to the hall to wait for dinner! Very nice setup, even if everything seems a little spaced out. Oh!! And I saw a white peacock!! That was really cool.

Congratulations and best wishes to Curt and Cary!

Let's talk about.... Things to watch for!

I am often asked "what should we be careful of? What goes wrong most often?" I've given a lot of thought to this, and here's what I've come up with:

1. Poor vendor choice. Selecting someone because you know them may save you a few bucks, but you will probably pay for it in professionalism. Selecting someone because they are the least expensive will also cost you, in terms of the product and professionalism you receive. I've attended weddings where the vendors wore dirty clothing, where the photographer cut in front of the videographer and stayed there, etc... Ask around!

2. Knowing what to get worked up about. If the toddler gets up and runs to mommy, it's fine. Don't try to correct them, you'll just make it worse 99 percent of the time. Just pick the baby up and carry on. If you decided to have a dog present and it's snuffling around doing doggy things, that's fine. However, the person whispering "come here, come here, sit down", etc, is much more likely to be intrusive. Stay in the moment. Let the rest go.

3. Not taking the physical environment into account. If you are having an outdoor wedding, please plan for your bridal party to wear shoes with low heels or flats. Same for if you are having them descend a staircase. For going up an incline or stairs, it can be impractical with a floor length gown. Keep the physical environment in mind when selecting your outfits!

More later!

Amy and Jason, take 2

Amy and Jason had their "just make it legal" wedding in February, but this was their "big" wedding. They had it at the Vineyards in Paw Paw.

Did I mention this is my big sister? For me, the best part of the whole thing was the father/daughter song choice. Red River Valley. Our dad plays the piano and used to have singalongs with all three of us all the time. I know, that sounds totally dorky, doesn't it? But Red River Valley was one of his signature tunes. I didn't know it ahead of time and when it started I went "Awwwwww!!" so loud that everyone stared. :P

Have to say, it's more fun to do weddings that are NOT family, simply because I don't wind up bussing tables and driving drunks home!!!

Chad and Becki

This was my first wedding at the Riviera Theater in Three Rivers. Wow, is it gorgeous. Much like the State Theater in Kalamazoo.... gold leaf, carved details, rich colors, etc. It also has a bar!! Nice for those who arrive early.

I would say it's a good place if you are planning on having a large bridal party, as there is quite a bit of space to fill between the stage and the first row of seats. The stairs can also be a little awkward if you are choosing a large dress.

They are just an adorable couple, and I wish them the best! You know I love a teary bride!

The photos my daughter took of me all turned out stupid, so I left those out. :) But the one to the right just does not do justice to the ornate beauty of the theatre. It's a really neat place.

Jennifer and Zachary

Today's wedding was at Crane Park. Although it's right on a busy street, the way the hill is keeps the wedding area shielded from much of the sound. This was a traditional wedding, big white dress and all. The bridesmaids wore black dresses with pink sashes -- well, not sashes, as it was a sewn in part of the dress, but I don't know what else to call that middle part.

They did something I hadn't seen before - but loved! Rose blossoms - just the heads - were strewn throughout the area that would serve as the altar. It really defined the space, and was more visually interesting (in my opinion) than plain rose petals. Plus they wouldn't blow away the way petals would.

Lots of laughing, lots of crying, both sides of the family delighted... what a great day! Congratulations!

Photo courtesy of http://www.imaginationphotography.org/ out of Elkhart In. GORGEOUS photos, personable and professional, highly recommended!!

Kelli and Brent

Kelli and Brent have started their family already, and decided that it was time to tie the knot! We did a very brief ceremony at Lakeview Park - there is a secluded deck in the woods overlooking the lake - and it was just in and out! Beautiful bride, proud groom, amazing weather, what more could you ask for?

Best wishes to the happy family!

Nate and Katie's Wedding

Nate and Katie's wedding was held at the Silo in Allegan. I'd never done a wedding there before, and it's quite lovely! Since it's near the river, I assumed it would be ON the river, but what they have instead is a very nice large gazebo and a large pond. It's pretty quiet there too, which is nice - often venues are a little too close to highways for a quiet outdoor setting.

The wind was a-kickin' though, which really kind of beat the stuffing out of all of us! I thought that a tight ponytail and a ton of hairspray would do the trick, but no luck. I thought I liked this suit, but I'm taking it out of the rotation, I think. I'm not "feeling it" lately.

Let's see, the girly details.... Purple and silver were the colors, and the bridesmaids wore a very deep purple. The bride was gorgeous, as all my brides are! Her brother sang a song he wrote for the couple during the ceremony and that was really beautiful.

It turns out the DJ was someone I know - and highly recommend (Guy, through Wiser Productions), so it was great to get to chat with him for a while. The couple also decided to spring for a couple of fun extras - a portable photobooth (hence, my dorky pic), and a sundae bar from Coldstone! It's the little things like that which make a wedding memorable. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the photobooth concept. I'm planning on having one for my daughter's sweet 16.

So, another day, another happy couple. I love my life. :)

Top photo by Stacey McKinney.

Bottom by photo booth!!

Joe and Amber

Joe and Amber had their "legal" wedding already, as he is in the Marine Corps. This is very, very common, for military couples to have two anniversaries. So today was their "big" wedding!

It took place at Bay Pointe Inn, my second wedding there this year. Fortunately the weather held, so we were able to do it outdoors. (My last one there had to be moved inside.) It was really a beautiful day, and the sprinkles held off until everyone was in the protected reception area. They've also just installed a very pretty white arbor, which helps in defining the altar space.

It was a traditional wedding - big white dress, handsome Marine in dress blues... and he actually got more emotional than she did! Crying brides don't faze me, but the grooms cut straight to my heart. They seem very in tune, and I'm happy to welcome them to the Marine Corps family!!!

Josh and Echo

I took a nice drive down to South Bend, Indiana today for the wedding of Josh and Echo. They are a sweet young couple who already have a son and one on the way, so they've already got the hang of being a family. It was just time to make it official.

It was a rainy day, which made for a very impressive view from the Summit Club downtown. The wedding and reception were held up there and it was very striking. I wouldn't recommend planning a large ceremony there, as it is a narrow space, but for the intimate wedding it is a good fit. Their staff was *amazing*. Some of the best I've encountered.

The brides' mom couldn't be there, as her other daughter was in labor! So I'm sending an email copy of the script since she missed it. Everything was very laid back and fun.... a bouncy son, a funny groom, and a teary-eyed bride. I think we had a great time!

Alas, I still haven't gotten around to getting a new camera, so no pics from me, but hope springs eternal for emailed pics from the couple!

Congratulations Josh and Echo!

Anthony and Cynthia

Today was Anthony and Cynthia's wedding. They are clients who, I think, have become friends. It's always fun to marry people who have really been through a lot to get to where they are today. They met 26 years ago and after years of being best friends, drifting apart, reconnecting - finally realized there's no way they ever want to be apart. It's funny how many times I've heard that same story in my years of doing this .... many people marry high school sweethearts or friends, just not for twenty years!

It was a lovely home wedding, casual and breezy, and we were fortunate to miss the really awesome storms that came later. The bride's daughter and son stood up with them, and the bride's daughter and the groom's sister did readings. I'll share the one the bride's daughter read:

Real love is more than beautiful flowers and sweet words, more than candlelight dinners or romantic walks in the park. Real love is understanding through the difficult times, caring past the disagreements. It's laughing together when things are good, or laughing together - to keep from crying - when things couldn't go more wrong. Real love shows compassion and compromise, and forgives. And forgives. And forgives. Real love is everything you share together. Because to each of you, real love is, and always will be, the other.

Wishing many blessings on them as they start their new life together!

Mollie and Adis

I didn't get a photo of this one, so perhaps they'll email me one! Mollie and Adis and a few guests came over to get married at my home a few days ago. They were originally thinking of just "sign and go", but with a little encouragement from their guests, decided to stand up and take vows. As English isn't Adis's first language, there were a couple of bumps, but all in all I think very sweet and significant. Just a really nice couple who are very obviously well matched. Congratulations to them!

Next wedding report will be this weekend - and I'll be sure to get some photos!

Beverly and Eric

Today was my first wedding at Bay Pointe Inn. I have a couple more scheduled there, so it was nice to kind of get the "lay of the land" and meet the events coordinator, Mariesa, when I stopped by last month.

Since it turned out to be chilly, we had the ceremony inside the restaurant, which has a very light, breezy, vaguely nautical feel. It has great windows. A little challenging for my puny camera, but the pro assured me his photos were coming out fine.

Of the couple's combined three children, the two older stood up for their mother, and all three participated in the sand ceremony. The primary colors they used were very cheerful!! I see a lot of darker colors used, so this was a nice change of pace.

The ceremony went well overall, with a couple of very small children making their presence known, and some minor audio issues.

No Gazette ad this year.

They messed up, and I will have no Gazette ad this year. (My emails got lost in the ether, I guess.) This is disappointing, as the years I used it, it definitely made a difference.

So.......

Hmm. Guess we'll see what turns up!

Mike and Kelby

Mike and Kelby went with a very colorful scheme - the boys all wore pinstripe suits with hot pink ties, and the bridesmaids wore hot pink. (Except they had reverse-gender "bests", so the maid of honor was a guy, and the best man was a girl - she wore a blue dress to blend with the boys.) And check out that bouquet. Love it!!!

The site was GORGEOUS, but I have to say the pillars were a little awkward to work around. It also, oddly, had a fountain right behind the guests, so I fear the last couple of rows didn't hear a word. That's just poor space planning, in my opinion!! However, I can't even express how much I loved the site. I'm a sucker for a riverfront wedding site. I love the water!

Valentine's Day Weddings.

I had two Valentine's Day "elopements" this year. Normally I don't book on Valentine's Day, as it's also my daughter's birthday. However, since one was my sister, I couldn't refuse! And then the other was military, and you know I have a soft spot.

I didn't take a pic of the military one, hopefully she'll email me one. LOVED her dress! It was a very brief ceremony. Although they told me it would be just them and their sister, we wound up with a room full!

This pic is of my sister and her new husband Jay. They plan on having a "proper" wedding in a few months, but needed to make it legal on a short timeline. We did a handfasting instead of a ring exchange, because they want to save as many elements as possible for their big fancy wedding. My biggest thought on the photos I saw from this weekend is that I need a haircut. Therefore, no pics of me!!

Elopements are tricky, in that it's hard to find someplace other than your home to do it. So right now I'm using my front three season room for elopement weddings. I am pretty happy with the way it turned out, though there is some painting to be done yet. I have a larger three season room in the back that I've thought about using, but my dogs hang out in there too much to be able to keep it neat.

Best wishes to both happy couples. :)

I know, I know... but it works.

Sheila and I just celebrated our thirtieth wedding anniversary.Somebody asked her, what was our secret? She answered, “On my wedding day, I decided to make a list of ten of Tim’s faults which, for the sake of our marriage, I would always overlook. I figured I could live with at least ten!” When she was asked which faults she had listed, Shelia replied, “I never did get around to listing them. Instead, every time he does something that makes me mad, I simply say to myself, ‘Lucky for him,it’s one of the ten!’”

Tim Hudson, Chicken Soup for the Romantic Soul, 2002


Believe it or not, I did that too. It wasn't ten things, it was only three. And at the time, they seemed sooooooooo significant. Now, almost 12 years into our relationship, I can't remember two of the three. I DO remember one, just because he still does it! It's one of those laundry on the floor things. But after all this time, I laugh as I shake my head at him, because it's just one of those things that make him, him. It costs me nothing to pick it up, and it would cost me a lot to choose to start a fight over it every day!

It's not as hard to embrace flaws as you might think. All it takes is one question: "If he does (fill in the blank) every day for the rest of my life, will it still be worth it to be with him?" Odds are, the answer is yes. Odds are, you'll feel a little sheepish when you realize how much time and energy you have spent on whether the socks landed on the floor or in the basket. Don't you have better things to focus on? Better things to build your life around?

I thought so.

Make your list now. Choose the three things that irritate you above all other. (Obviously, infidelity, abuse, etc are not appropriate for this task!) And decide to forgive those three things. You'll be suprised what it does for your relationship.

The Wedding Show Circuit

Tis the season... for wedding shows! And boy, I really need to remember to bring earplugs with me. The DJ's keep everything at top volume. I had a sore throat leaving the Wiser Productions show at the McCamly today!

As my sister is getting married this year, everything "is all about her". It's fun! I'm not a cake sampling kind of person, but bringing her with me gives me a fresh perspective on the show circuit.

Things are starting to pick up... it's that time of year. I can't wait until the Gazette bridal section comes out. I advertise in it off and on and have good results with it.

In the meantime, I'm doing some ceremony writing, and trying to organize my former ceremonies into some sort of intelligent way so I can use them as resources.

Jason and Lindsey's Christmas Eve wedding!

This wedding was great!! Everyone was so laid back. It was in the park, and about 30 people showed up even though the roads were iffy, and the wind was insane.

The photographer wiped out on the ice in the beginning of the ceremony, and we had to pause for the groom to blow his nose in the middle! It was just fun and happy and loving and very, very short!

Wow

Another testament to the importance of choreographing your ceremony and forseeing pitfalls.

http://video.yahoo.com/watch/3710199/10203309

And wearing a belt.

http://video.yahoo.com/watch/2996613/8572613

Matt and Katie's Wedding

Now this was a fun wedding for me. It started with a loooooooong drive to the east side of the state. It was at St. Clair Shores at this adorable little hotel. If you've ever been to Frankenmuth, the style is kind of like that. Anyway, St. Clair Shores is about a half hour south of Port Huron, and right on a river that marks the border between Canada and the U.S. (I think it's a river, not sure though.)

The wedding was held in a grassy area right on the riverfront. It was really neat because there were all sorts of steamers coming by. The bridesmaids looked like little gifts from Tiffany, having that neat aqua blue color dress, with a white sash. The bride was just too pretty for words. She and her groom really seemed in sync to me, and both really relaxed about the big day. Their families were wonderful and gracious. Because it was such a drive, they put me up in the hotel and invited me to the rehearsal dinner. The food was fabulous! And the dad brought me a bag of the most amazing sweet corn.

The only bad thing was that there was a definite tilt towards the shore. Also, the microphone on my rental equipment had a failure and I had to run up to Port Huron and buy a new one.

Beforehand, I went to some random hairdresser in town and the lady who did my hair was about a million years old. This pic is after I had her shrink it down some - it was BIG initially. Also, for some reason I have a case of wonky eye here. Overall, not my best look. However I'm including it here, as there's not a ton of pics in me in a robe and I really like the robe.

Best wishes to Matt and Katie - thanks so much for sharing your photos with me!

Random movie wisdom

This scene is from an old movie -- not too old, it's in color -- named Magnificent Obsession.

It was released in 1954 and starred Jane Wyman and Rock Hudson. In this movie Jane Wyman's husband, a surgeon, has taught a philosophy described as follows:

Merrick: "How’d he do that? How could a surgeon help?"
Randolph: "Well, he taught me…he showed me how to establish contact with a source of Infinite Power."
Merrick: "That sounds fine. What does it mean?"
Randolph, laughing: "Well, let me put it this way. [Turns to a lamp.] This lamp isn’t working now. It cold and it’s dark…all the parts are there. It’s a perfect lamp, but…"
Merrick: "It’s just not turned on?"
Randolph: "Right. But if I turn the switch [Lamp comes on.], and establish contact, the bulb will draw power from the powerhouse down at the Dam and it’ll do what it was meant to do. Which is to make light."
Merrick: "All right, so you’re saying that people have a sort of powerhouse, too."
Randolph: "Right. When you establish contact with that, you can do what you’re meant to do. You can fulfill your destiny."
Merrick: "I can turn on a light."
Randolph: "I don’t think that that’s your destiny. Do you?"
Merrick: "No, I guess not. But assuming there is a, well, power of some kind, or whatever you want to call it. How do you establish contact with it?"
Randolph: "It’s very simple. Just be of real service to people. Find people who need help, and help them. But always in secret. Never let it be known. Never ask to be repaid."
Merrick: "But if you’re in service to people, then why does it have to be kept secret?"
Randolph: "That’s probably the most important part of his belief. Let’s go back to the powerhouse. If the wires in the dynamo are not protected by insulation, the power will be dissipated. The same thing goes for us. Most personalities are just grounded, that’s all that ails them."
Merrick: "I see. You mean keeping these good deeds secret is like insulating the power of your personality."
Randolph: "Yeah, that’s near enough."
Merrick: "Well, is it’s as simple as all that, why, I’ll certainly give it a chance."
Randolph: "Now wait, Merrick! Don’t try to use this unless you’re ready for it! You can’t just try this out for a week like a new car, you know! And if you think you can feather your own nest with it, just forget it. [Cue heavenly choir…] Besides, this is dangerous stuff. One of the first men who used it, went to the cross at the age of thirty-three..."

This exchange seemed to me to sum up so many beliefs that are consistent in diverse belief systems. The concept of giving/giving back (tithing, charity), denying the ego, connecting with the power/Spirit/divine within you to achieve your purpose. Certainly a little prayer, meditation, etc, would help out too but in general I think the writers were on the right track. According to a blogger called Candy Minx, The novel Magnificent Obsession likely took it's plot from the following: "Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.....That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly." (Matthew Chapter 6:1-4.)

Other than that, the movie's extremely corny, which I love. :) They're just so earnest! Were people ever really that earnest?

Ashley & Chris' Wedding, and some musing.

I thought it would be a nice change of pace to review certain weddings in my blog, as I'm about to link it to my main site. Let me know what you think - do you enjoy hearing about the weddings I perform?

Yesterday Ashley and Chris got married in a local college's chapel. The site was beautiful and they even hired a proper organist. This reflects a trend I've been seeing lately -- going back to the traditional wedding. (One couple this summer even had an ice sculpture, and I've only seen a handful of those over the years.)

Ashley's dress was beautiful, as were the bridesmaids'. (The boys cleaned up good too.) The flowers were very pretty - they weren't what you would think of as ordinary wedding-style flowers. They were little explosions of fall color, totally appropriate and cheerful. One thing I was impressed with was that their parents all seemed to get along so well. It's rare that there's no drama between the families of the intended, or even their own parents and step parents. They were all just lovely. I had a really good time.

The day before the ceremony, the bride gave me a reading. At first glance, it didn't really speak to me, but when I came home and rehearsed it out loud, I found it was quite powerful. Here it is:

The Invitation, by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life’s betrayals, or have become shrivelled and closed, from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness, and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes, without cautioning us, to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.If you can bear the accusation of betrayal, and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless, and therefore trustworthy.**

I want to know if you can see Beauty, even when it is not pretty, every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.**

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake, and shout to the silver of the full moon,“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done, to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand, in the centre of the fire, with me, and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom, you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself, and if you truly like the company you keep, in the empty moments.

© Mountaindreaming, from the book The Invitation published by HarperSanFrancisco, 1999 All rights reserved

**The bride chose to eliminate the starred stanzas. I think it was a good choice.

I realize that's a lot of commas, but otherwise this post would be a hundred miles long with all the line breaks the author uses. Anyway, at the time I wrote a transition from that last stanza about how only by liking the company you keep when alone, can you become a fit companion for marriage, or something along those lines.

But I was thinking about this later for quite a while. It's unrealistic to say "you shouldn't get married until you are 100% at peace with yourself". In fact, it is through spiritual intimacy with another that we learn the most fundamental lessons about ourselves. If I were writing that transition today it would say that growing up, becoming an adult, is about learning to be at peace with yourself. But marriage is about doing that while simultaneously learning to share that authentic self with another person without fear of judgement or reprisal.

My life changed when I realized that he knew me, knew my true authentic self, and loved me. Loved me because of it, in spite of it, but in full awareness of it. Or perhaps "loved me because of me, in spite of me, but in full awareness of me". I wish that feeling of awe and wonder for Ashley and Chris. They're just the sweetest couple and deserve only good things.

Marriage as transformation.

For decades couples have been living together and sleeping together for years before they marry. (I was one of them, so please don't think I judge.) But I can't help but think that something is lost in that.

The act of marriage used to be a transformative event. Before marriage, you were a virgin and lived with your parents. Your life was probably family-centric or self-centric.

So instead of the flush of new love (which clinically lasts about a year and a half) to see you through while you establish a life together, people are getting married well after that wears off. I don't really think that does them any favors.

I think that first year and a half of being together puts a soft focus on everything. You're more willing to overlook the socks on the floor, or the fact that he doesn't ever put a new bag in the trash can when he takes the trash out. By the time that soft focus wears off, your routines are in place.

Yes, I believe you should take the time to know someone very well before marrying them. But how long does it really take to get to know someone's character? After 3 years, I knew my first husband's character - I just chose to ignore that knowledge. My current husband... well, he had me at hello, but it didn't take more than a few months to figure him out -- to figure out what the core of him was, and that I couldn't bear to let him slip through my fingers. Still, it took 4 years for us to marry. I credit the Marine Corps with keeping us apart enough that our time together felt as special as those first months of love tend to.

Just... thinking.

Choose Your Life

Other “children of the 80’s” may remember the Choose Your Own Adventure series of books. You would read a few pages, and it would present you with options. If you chose option A, it would instruct you to turn to page 35; for option B, page 42, and the story would carry on from there. You had to go with the information you had at the time, and take your best shot. Ten decisions later, more often than not, I wound up dead, and had to backtrack. After a few defeats, I got sneaky… I would find the page that contained the ending I wanted, and then work my way backwards to figure out which path would lead me there.


At the time it felt like cheating, rather than strategizing. Cheat/Win terminology implies that you are dishonest or that your success causes someone else to fail – that each victory is offset by someone else’s loss. But that isn’t the case. Your success does not cost someone else their own success. Success in your marriage doesn’t cause others to fail. It causes your spouse to be more successful in marriage as well. The same logic applies to being successful in parenting – certainly your children benefit from your success.


In life, we move forward. Everything has a beginning, then middle, then an end, in precisely that order. It doesn’t seem like working backwards is an option. I propose to you that, in fact, it is. It’s exactly that easy! Popular psychology often tells us how to do it! Want to quit smoking? You are told to visualize yourself as a non-smoker. Want to earn more at your job? Choose a fancy car you desire and tape ads for the car where you see them every day. Each of these methods does the same thing. They ask you to look at the end result – where you want to be. Focusing on your goal causes you, consciously AND unconsciously, to change an infinite number of minor things about the way you think or act. This very effective approach to life is called an “outcome based perspective”. You may have heard it phrased “begin with the end in mind”, as #2 of Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.

Now, while I preach it, and teach it, there are of course many instances when I do not LIVE it. Recently many of those moments have centered around having a teenager. So I'm taking some time to refocus. To think about what my desired outcomes are as a parent, and whether I am trying to hard to win battles without realizing that I am losing the war.

Sunday Service: Religion, Service, and Doubt.

Mother Theresa was once asked what the hardest part was of her vocation. She replied with a single word. "Doubt". And indeed, a book was recently released that reproduces her personal correspondence of many years. Those letters show not just doubt, but an incredible struggle with not "feeling" God.

http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1655415,00.html

Does the doubt negate her service? Or does it make it all the more precious? Isn't service in the face of doubt really faith in action?

Sunday Sermon: Hang in there, I do have a point.

My brother is getting married soon, and I am officiating the ceremony. He was raised Jewish, although he isn't religious now. However, most people reference the religion they were raised in, or the religion of their parents when they plan their wedding.

Now, last year I spent some time studying Judaism. One of the traditions they have is to not spell out the word God. They use "G-d" instead. Thatguyjoe on Yahoo Answers explains it thusly: Jews take seriously the part about not using the Lord's name in vain so, rather than take that risk, they never use the name of god. They don't speak it, they don't write it. In order to make sure they really obey the commandment, they don't even write out the pronoun God fully. They abbreviate it.

I feel that is a beautiful tradition. Super-respectful. It kind of reminds me of the way you call older people Sir or Ma'am because to use their first name would be too familiar.

Now, I am also a fan of the Harry Potter series. (Confused? Hang in there.) In the Harry Potter books, Voldemort is the bad guy. For much of the series, people refer to him as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named because they are afraid of invoking Voldemort's spirit, attracting his attention, whatever. In that case, it's not a matter of respect, it's a matter of fear. Harry feels silly doing that and just calls him Voldemort, which seems to humanize the villain and make him less terrifying.

Does calling God God make him less terrifying? Because while He's all-knowing and all-loving and everything, there's still a whole lot of smiting going on. He can be a scary dude.
Is that why people cling to the image of Jesus? Let's face it, Jesus is a lot friendlier. He's a teacher, a shepherd, a fisher of men... all very non-confrontational images. We take it even further when using popular images of him, to the point where the Buddy Christ satire in the movie Dogma seems not that unrealistic.
God the Father. Remember that phrase? It might sound fairly pleasant now, but in earlier years, your father was also a scary guy. (Might I mention, also a guy you would not call by his first name? I learned that the hard way.) I myself experienced the business end of a belt more than once. With that fear came respect, and that fear did not negate love. But over the generations, fathers have become more their childrens' friends. They have morphed from God to Buddy Christ.














Our ideas about God are deeply affected by our perceptions of our fathers. Many who had distant fathers are unable to reconcile that with an Eternal Father who is always there. Those who had "buddy" fathers can't quite wrap their heads around the idea that God will come down there and beat your metaphorical ass for breaking His rules.

How do you view God? Does a false sense of familiarity breed a very dangerous contempt? Would a little more fear and respect be appropriate? Not because of the consequences -- not because of fire and brimstone... But because HE'S GOD. Creator of all. Awesome in the original sense of the word.  Just a thought.

On performing weddings...

While it's easy to get overwhelmed when you're pounding out one wedding after another (a couple months have been crazy this year), there's a certain withdrawal that takes place when it's been too long since the last one. Weddings may seem tedious to some, with all the pressure and detail, but I enjoy them so much.

While sometimes the couples are people that I wouldn't hang out with socially, it's really fascinating to me to see how they fit together. There really is someone out there for everyone, I swear!

I've been with my husband for over a decade, but I still get to immerse myself in the romance of a fresh new beginning every time I officiate. I come home full of light and hope and love, and look at my husband with eyes that are kind when they might otherwise be critical. It allows me to renew and rededicate myself to my vows as often as every week, which is an amazing gift.

While I don't mean this to be a religious blog, a common theme in religions is "God is Love". If we're all made in the image of God, then we become most like God when exercising our ability to love.

While my other obligations keep me from maintaining a full-on congregation with all its commitments, I am very blessed by my wedding ministry. I hope to expand beyond it someday, but if this is all I can handle, I'll take it gratefully. I wish everyone got as much out of their jobs as I do.